For Your Benefit

Good morning! For your benefit,
We're smart and full of zest.
We don't wear two-a-penny kit:
We're corporately dressed.

We're suited up to clear your name
For any welfare due;
In uniform, we'll hear your claim,
Provided that you queue.

From now on, we are bound to laugh
Or give a winning smile,
For we believe that counter staff
Should have a touch of style.

Our men will gaily sport a 'tache,
Our ladies bob their hair,
And any client short of cash
Will have an easy chair.

Our lighting will be quite subdued,
So, if you're in a jam,
Or short of (say) a bite of food,
You'll love our monogram.

Our forms will have a peaceful shade -
Cerise, perhaps, or lime,
So should you ever be delayed,
You'll have a happy time.

If single mothers gaze upon
Our comforting apparel,
We're sure they'll heap their praises on
Their scraping from our barrel.

You're sick? You're out of milk? You're broke?
You're long-term unemployed?
Dear madam, give this silk a stroke,
And you'll be overjoyed.


From Tony Blair reminds me of a budgie

Benefits staff spent 1.7 million last year on 'corporate clothing'. Staff can choose from a range of jackets", shirts. blouses, cardigans, trousers, maternity dresses, belts and polo shirts," all paid for out of the social security budget. (The Observer).