Investors In People

Here we huddle, humble ova
In our early learning wombs
Waiting till the testing's over
As the spume shoot up the flumes

- Know their mission and ambition
- Know the world from X to Y
- Pass a special test on fission
- Prove that we can multiply

- Pick the toughest of the taddies
- Fertilise the wisest way
- Know our mummies from our daddies
- Always shun unstructured play

Tell us what the great and good said!
Suppose we blunder, make a bodge?
What if we should make a Woodhead?
Or hatch another Margaret Hodge?

[September 1999]

From Labour Pangs

Under "Early Learning Goals", three-year olds will be tested on their skills, and nurseries judged by OFSTED. Education minister Margaret Hodge said she was "fed up of hearing how unstructured activity [is] all that a young child needs".