I Would Vote

I would vote if I could vote by attaching
a virus to an e-mail.
I would vote if I could vote on the back of
an envelope.
I would vote if I could vote by blowing up
a coloured balloon.
I would vote if I could vote by phoning a friend,
or going 50-50.
I would vote if I could vote by single
transferable fiver.
I would vote if I could vote la carte.
I would vote if I could vote by putting my hand up
the candidate.
I would vote if I could vote by straw poll.
I would vote if I could vote by exit poll.
I would vote if I could vote if I could turn out
my pockets.
I would vote if I could vote if I could turn out
a better person
I would vote if I could vote by beaming.
I would vote if I could vote by semaphore.
I would vote if I could vote by lots,
lots of them.
I would vote if I could vote for the ballet
and not the bullet.
Instead I have voted with my feet
up on this sofa. Good night.


[May 2002]

From Make Mine A Double