Euro Creep

I am a Euro creep. I have come
to purloin your coin, to darken your
doors, and to pepper your mint.
I will drain your port, I will
diddle your quid, I will drown
your system with lethal methyl.
I will repel all hoarders, by eating
the fat cache under your mattress,
your favourite savings. I will board
the gravy train, and cuckold
your loose goose. Your sterling
will curl. I will jump your jacket
and, worse, I will poison your purse.
My randy hands feel your packet.
Don't sleep. I am a Euro creep.


[December 2001]

From Make Mine A Double

The euro was blamed in advance for poisoning one in seven customers, and for price hikes. Michael Howard referred to 'euro creep'.